Wait, so are you a website or a fucking newspaper?
Thanks for the question! We are both: this website here is distributed worldwide, and the paper edition is distributed through the Los Angeles area.

Awesome! Where can I pick one up?
The cool parts of LA – Hollywood, Los Feliz, downtown, etc. We will be posting an official distribution list soon, but in the meantime just walk into every store in Los Angeles until you find one.

I want to advertise!
Oh, thank God. You have no idea how close we were to closing up shop. Email the ad department here.

I saw the hard cover with the cube – that was kind of weird.
Fuck you, that was hilarious!

How often do you update your site?
80,000 times an hour, give or take 2,000 times.

Are you having trouble thinking of other questions? Perhaps you’re just trying to think of joke questions at this point?
What are you, some sort of psychologist?!?

Do you take submissions?
I’ll say it again: fine, we’ll take a look. Make it funny and make it short.  Send your genius here.